It isn't everyday the commercial aspect of alcohol and partying decide to give handouts in the form of "Free Flow" and "Free Food". So you know that when they do we will party even harder.
Cafe Del Mar celebrated its 2nd anniversary the past Saturday and had us on the guest list as VIPs. Not only that, they were celebrating it with a generous quantity of free food and drinks. With this promise we knew we had to be there, what else can possibly take precedence over this event we asked ourselves.
Del Mar had 10 of us on their guest list, but it wasn't an issue because those that were not on the guest list can always ride off the overflowing glasses we had at the table. The official event started at 6.30pm with the buffet scheduled for 7pm. We were already at Siloso beach since 2pm gulping down cans of beer which we had brought in our icebox.
Drinking beer against the backdrop of the setting sun was the highlight of the night, the picturesque scenery coupled with the promise of free alcohol fueled our spirits as we counted down the hours before dinner.
At this point it probably sounds like we are cheap bastards and bargain hunters out for cheap thrills. Well there is no hiding the fact, we are cheap bastards. Years and years of spending money to get drunk has cultivated a seeded hatred for commercialism in which culminated in a showdown on the very beaches of Siloso Beach. So when the free flow started flowing, so did we.
By the time the buffet started we were already well into our 3rd or 4th bottle of beer. After about 2-3 servings of dinner we were way past the legal limit. Hell who are we kidding we were past the limit at 4pm and now we were just challenging the boundaries of human endurance. Waves upon waves of beer were sent to our table while we played games, somewhere along the lines these games included a competition to see who amongst us could empty an entire bottle of beer in one single gulp, and the fastest at that too. The loser, of course, had to finish another bottle of beer.
After about 12 bottles of beer, each, we decided to switch to my choice cocktail "Vodka Red Bull". A this point we were the loudest, noisiest table in the VIP area, I'm not shitting we were so loud the people around us were avoiding us. And our table was the only one which truly understood the meaning of "Free Flow", clearly evident with the amount of empty bottles and glasses littering our sides. Take a look at the picture below, you can actually still see empty bottles stashed under our tables, and the new drinks which were overflowing onto deck stools and the floor.
I couldn't find any picture depicting the sorry scene at other tables but they were mostly limited to under 5 bottles scattered around. It actually got so crazy the waiter refused to serve us more drinks till we have finished our current stockpile. I had to approach a waiter from another section to serve us cos the ones in our section all hated us.
By 9pm we were reasonably tanked and decided to sober up by taking a swim, this was where we met this expat dude whom we shall refer to as Antonio (Remembering names while tanked is one thing i have no talent for). Antonio was either more tanked than us or he was very generous because after spending 15 mins in the pool body slamming and spearing each other he sent over 2 bottles of Moet & Chandon to our tables. This would seem crazy on a normal day because one bottle of Moet must have costed like $150-$180 at a place like this. But in our inebriated states, we all hailed him as our hero for the night and proceeded to drink the champagne straight out of the bottle.
One stranger i clearly remember meeting that night was another expat called "Jesus". I'm not shitting because i checked his identification.
Me: Hey mate, what's your name?
Expat: Jesus!
Me: Fuck off!
Jesus: Check it (Hands me his ID)
Me: Fuck Me! I'm drinking with Jesus!!
Jesus: HAHAHA!!
Not surprisingly Jesus was the discovery of the night, everybody had to have a drink with Jesus. After the 11th toast Jesus wasn't looking so thrilled anymore and went back to avoiding us.
We were all feeling very friendly all of a sudden and proceeded to make friends with random people around us. This included the group of 3 malays beside our table and some random people shuffling on the dance floor, all the while shoving bottles and cups into their faces.
Me: Dude this is crazy, it's like we're taking revenge on all the money we spent in clubs!
Justin: Yeah man!! We need more drinks!! (Proceeds to order another round from shocked waiter)
By the time my girlfriend and Kristy arrived pass 12am, the free flow had ended, much to the relief of the waiters in our section. We proceeded to Boo the bartender before ordering 2 more jugs of Vodka Red Bull during the ensuing "One-For-One" promotion. Armed with 4 jugs of "Paid" vodka we proceeded to invade the dancefloor leaving those who have fallen asleep on the sofa-beds behind.
When most of the drunkenness has been washed away by the sea-water and the pool, i noticed a patch of redness on the heel of my foot. The blood had dried up by this time and the wound was infested with sand and dirt (I had no idea how or when i was injured). Worried that the wound might get infected by the sand and dirt, my mind raced through various medical scenarios which all resulted in amputation such as Gangrene and Necrosis.
With concise medical knowledge i ripped the skin flap off the cut and washed the wound with a mixture of seawater and beer. Proud of my achievements i proceeded back into dance-floor only to have the wound infested with sand and dirt again. With Alcohol clouding my brain and blocking out the pain, i made the decision to risk amputation for the name of Fun.
Honestly though, i don't think the wound will be so badly infected, after all i did hang out with Jesus, even offered him drinks, why would he condemn me to amputation?
By 4am the "sleepers" had woken up and came out of their nest to join us. That was also the time we heard the single most foul statement.
Beng: Dude i think they're Closing.
All: FUCK!!
posted by Ken The Man at
